[ In truth, Hades is about to spit more venom. About to damn this truce and storm away, leaving this girl to wonder whether or not he is truly going to uphold it after all. But then she has the audacity to stand there and tell him that she agrees on some points. He is better. He is her better.
That they are similarities between them. She's actually thinking about him and trying to understand him personally. When had he allowed her to see that? When had she started to get so damn perceptive? Where had the great Emet-Selch miscalculated that this child could get under his skin and see into things that are better left alone? Better left unspoken. ]
You... You know nothing about me.
[ It's said with anger that he can't contain. Because he's torn, he really is. There had been something about this creature that he had just... Been holding out for. Holding onto. He doesn't know what it is, only that he remembers the sensation because Hades had felt it before while holding -
No. No he's not going back there. Not allowing for those sort of emotions to take root in his heart again. He'll only be disappointed. Emet-Selch always is. ]
Though if there is one thing that you are correct about it is that we may not be so different in our actions. In what we are willing to do.
[ His anger grows and she almost wants to hug him. It was never going to happen, but she can't deny the urge was there. She wanted to comfort him, but she knows from experience - from being the angry one, that comfort isn't the right thing in situations like this. Not when he clearly wants another reason to lash out because she thinks she understands him a little better. ]
Why are you so furious with me? Are you mad because I told you what I see from you've shown me? Is it because you're right, I don't know you, but I still see something to relate to in you?
[ Those are all such stupid questions to ask, but she is genuinely curious. In for a gil, she supposed. She stays calm in his storm of anger and there's honestly something familiar about it. Like most things about him. Familiar, but terribly wrong.
She's so tired and honestly, she wonders if she should make him angry enough to spit words he likely doesn't mean and leave or if she should just stop bothering poking at cracks to see what really lays behind that mask she hates and just let him calm down so they can walk the rest of the way to the city in silence.
Or she could ask him the question that just hit her. It was absolutely the stupidest question yet that she's had for him. And she thinks she'll need to pray to Rhalgr that he does not come at her swinging for it. ]
Are you angry because you want to like me for some unfathomable reason?
[ She tries to look apologetic that she has to even ask this of him.
Though, she admittedly finds some comfort in the fact that she's gotten under his skin with her honesty, very satisfying. That she knows enough to at least see the cracks and let him be the one wanting to throw a fit. When she has slept, this will be her sole comfort that came from this whole exchange - she will do them both a favor and pretend that it never happened.
That she wasn't vulnerable and open, that she didn't blatantly tell him that she can see the similarities between them and that he is better than her. That she thinks she wants to like him even though he makes her want to punch him in the face any time he opens his stupidly smug mouth. That she pities him.
There are a great many things about this whole exchange Caligi will pretend never happened and she hopes he follows her lead should he feel gracious enough after her questions she's put him through.
Caligi feels awkward standing there, just watching him fume and maybe -- maybe it might be better if she didn't get those questions answered. For both of them, in the long run. She pinches her brows together and barely nods to herself. ]
Actually, don't answer any of those. I don't want to know any more. [ Liar. ] I overstepped, you're absolutely right. I don't know you and don't have the right to ask you these things. I'm not going to apologize, empty apologies are worth nothing, but you don't owe me any answer in any case.
[ She turns around, but does not start walking just yet. There's a piece of her that wonders if he's going to react to her stopping her questioning with more anger. There's a piece of her that would be furious with being denied the chance to tell the other party how wrong they were - even if they weren't, but this is one time where she hopes they do manage to differ on things like that. ]
[ It does feel awfully familiar, the way the girl seems to know just what pieces to pick at. There are hints. Clues as to why that is. Hades chooses to ignore them. Claim ignorance even if it is horribly plain to see. Perhaps that is why it gets under his skin so. Why it makes him angry and ache. There is that void within him that has been eating at him from the inside out for too long. Bereft of the companionship that he had in the days where he had been considered young or in his prime.
She would have done things like this. Then they would have argued and Hythlodaeus would have -
Would have but no longer can because of Her. Venat. Hydaelyn. The longer She plays this game and sends champions, the longer it will take to have what he has lost returned to him. It's upsetting, truly. Vexing, absolutely. No apologies offered can soothe that loss nor that ache. He would love to lash out and put it out there as plain as day, but he doesn't. No, it isn't the time. None of them remember so it wouldn't have any meaning.
But that, maybe, is what he keeps hoping for. That a sliver of those that he once loved could remain in that which is present in the now. A false hope that keeps beating him down.
He bites his tongue. Doesn't speak. Nothing productive or helpful would come out of it at the moment. So instead he stands. He won't disappear, but he's likely not going to follow any longer. Just allow the girl to walk of and he can stand there, ruminating and boiling in his thoughts and emotions. ]
[ There is one thing she thinks she needs to say before she begins walking away from this mess. So with her back straight and voice painfully open with grief she doesn't fully understand, she says: ]
Thank you for listening and I do hope you enjoy your cookie, whatever to choose to with it in the end. I made it myself. But... Be kinder to yourself, Emet-Selch. Shutting people out is easier, but not worth it in the end. I should know at least that much.
[ That's it, isn't it? That's all she really thinks she had left to say to him for now. She begins to walk away from him, careful steps and they become more confident when she feels exactly that in her own last words to him for the moment.
It's not a satisfying ending for her, but she didn't think there would be one when faced with him in the first place. She does -- she thinks she does, at least -- understand him a little better. Though how much of it she will think about later, well, that would depend on how much time she has to herself after it. ]
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no subject
That they are similarities between them. She's actually thinking about him and trying to understand him personally. When had he allowed her to see that? When had she started to get so damn perceptive? Where had the great Emet-Selch miscalculated that this child could get under his skin and see into things that are better left alone? Better left unspoken. ]
You... You know nothing about me.
[ It's said with anger that he can't contain. Because he's torn, he really is. There had been something about this creature that he had just... Been holding out for. Holding onto. He doesn't know what it is, only that he remembers the sensation because Hades had felt it before while holding -
No. No he's not going back there. Not allowing for those sort of emotions to take root in his heart again. He'll only be disappointed. Emet-Selch always is. ]
Though if there is one thing that you are correct about it is that we may not be so different in our actions. In what we are willing to do.
no subject
Why are you so furious with me? Are you mad because I told you what I see from you've shown me? Is it because you're right, I don't know you, but I still see something to relate to in you?
[ Those are all such stupid questions to ask, but she is genuinely curious. In for a gil, she supposed. She stays calm in his storm of anger and there's honestly something familiar about it. Like most things about him. Familiar, but terribly wrong.
She's so tired and honestly, she wonders if she should make him angry enough to spit words he likely doesn't mean and leave or if she should just stop bothering poking at cracks to see what really lays behind that mask she hates and just let him calm down so they can walk the rest of the way to the city in silence.
Or she could ask him the question that just hit her. It was absolutely the stupidest question yet that she's had for him. And she thinks she'll need to pray to Rhalgr that he does not come at her swinging for it. ]
Are you angry because you want to like me for some unfathomable reason?
[ She tries to look apologetic that she has to even ask this of him.
Though, she admittedly finds some comfort in the fact that she's gotten under his skin with her honesty, very satisfying. That she knows enough to at least see the cracks and let him be the one wanting to throw a fit. When she has slept, this will be her sole comfort that came from this whole exchange - she will do them both a favor and pretend that it never happened.
That she wasn't vulnerable and open, that she didn't blatantly tell him that she can see the similarities between them and that he is better than her. That she thinks she wants to like him even though he makes her want to punch him in the face any time he opens his stupidly smug mouth. That she pities him.
There are a great many things about this whole exchange Caligi will pretend never happened and she hopes he follows her lead should he feel gracious enough after her questions she's put him through.
Caligi feels awkward standing there, just watching him fume and maybe -- maybe it might be better if she didn't get those questions answered. For both of them, in the long run. She pinches her brows together and barely nods to herself. ]
Actually, don't answer any of those. I don't want to know any more. [ Liar. ] I overstepped, you're absolutely right. I don't know you and don't have the right to ask you these things. I'm not going to apologize, empty apologies are worth nothing, but you don't owe me any answer in any case.
[ She turns around, but does not start walking just yet. There's a piece of her that wonders if he's going to react to her stopping her questioning with more anger. There's a piece of her that would be furious with being denied the chance to tell the other party how wrong they were - even if they weren't, but this is one time where she hopes they do manage to differ on things like that. ]
no subject
She would have done things like this. Then they would have argued and Hythlodaeus would have -
Would have but no longer can because of Her. Venat. Hydaelyn. The longer She plays this game and sends champions, the longer it will take to have what he has lost returned to him. It's upsetting, truly. Vexing, absolutely. No apologies offered can soothe that loss nor that ache. He would love to lash out and put it out there as plain as day, but he doesn't. No, it isn't the time. None of them remember so it wouldn't have any meaning.
But that, maybe, is what he keeps hoping for. That a sliver of those that he once loved could remain in that which is present in the now. A false hope that keeps beating him down.
He bites his tongue. Doesn't speak. Nothing productive or helpful would come out of it at the moment. So instead he stands. He won't disappear, but he's likely not going to follow any longer. Just allow the girl to walk of and he can stand there, ruminating and boiling in his thoughts and emotions. ]
no subject
Thank you for listening and I do hope you enjoy your cookie, whatever to choose to with it in the end. I made it myself. But... Be kinder to yourself, Emet-Selch. Shutting people out is easier, but not worth it in the end. I should know at least that much.
[ That's it, isn't it? That's all she really thinks she had left to say to him for now. She begins to walk away from him, careful steps and they become more confident when she feels exactly that in her own last words to him for the moment.
It's not a satisfying ending for her, but she didn't think there would be one when faced with him in the first place. She does -- she thinks she does, at least -- understand him a little better. Though how much of it she will think about later, well, that would depend on how much time she has to herself after it. ]